Chicken Pox, Poker & Trading

It's been a month! So fast. Just a quick update on what's up with us. I am still jobless, spending hours every day job searching but outta luck (sad). I been on poker bug once again for the past month. I withdrawn most of my bankroll out of stars and left a bit for leisure grinding. But I still got stuck, busto and decided for the firstime in my poker career to go on a infinite hiatus. 

I been neglecting this site, trading and Bottle for some time.. leaving the lone spartan fighting against the armies of Xerxes himself. We still catch up every week, Bottle and I, he is still actively trading, but I caught chicken pox a week back and had been stuck at home miserably. Yeah, what an age to get infected. I'm sure most of you don't even remember the time when you had it. I've seen the western doctor and they gave me anti-viral pills and didn't mention about not eating anything. 

My mum, on the other hand, is a classic eastern style believer. During my days of infection, she said I was not allowed to eat chicken, beans, nuts, egg (yolks), and seafood!

Not sure how closely I obeyed, but I just tried. Can't wait to go to seafood buffet soon.

Anyway regarding poker, I think spreading my focus between trading and poker is not working out. Poker, recently to me has been tedious experience. Making it short and simply, the joy of winning could no longer compensate the pain of losing. When that happens, that's when I think it's time to move on from certain venture.

I have neglected many books and I am going to catch up with them too. We have recently stopped Diablo 3 for a while, but will be bringing ourselves back together soon. I have decided to take these time clearing my books. Some have already grown mold before I even started reading. Recently found an app TED.com, they have it on android and iOS devices, on many insightful talks from experts of many fields. Very interesting.

Finally break my losing streak (8 straight losses) with a very small win. Nevertheless, still a win. Booking a small win during losing streak is a necessity to slowly build back your confidence and focus. I have to admit the previous trades were reckless. There are many habits of me that does not fit a trader, I'm sure I'm not alone, and that is what we are trying to change.

And that habit, comes from your mind. Whatever you punch into your keyboard, the words, the lot size, your take-profit and stop-loss, whatever you think the market is doing, comes from your mind. You think you should execute the trade now, you think you should book the win, cut the loss, the let loss run (familiar) because closing it means surrendering and admitting your defeat.

From my experiences of trading, gambling or poker (there are similarities and difference between them in certain aspect though), trying to win every single hand/trades (battle) ironically, causes the (overall) defeat in our war. I am a very good example. 

Previously, I can't go to bed with a loss (sometimes even now). I don't stop trading until I have a win. And 8 out of 10 times I drag even more losses trying to do it. And ironically, the 2 out of 10 times you succeed in trying so, spells the doom to your next trades. Because you think that since you succeed in trying to force a win, you can do it again. And every 10 times you do it, you will fail most of the time trying to do it, but your mind keeps flashing back to that only few times you succeeded. So you keep doing it, still. Just like a lottery.

As I always have the [loser] habit of abandoning my trade journal during losing streak, I now plan to write more regularly and simply add into the comment section of myfxbook.com for every single trades. I still love the detailed and service myfxbook provides and its free. I'm not endorsing it, but I think it provides more extensive information than any brokers' statement themselves. Usually for such service in the poker industry costs you money. 

It's Friday now, last trading day of the week. Good luck if you're trading, if not, happy weekend!

Black